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Training Lallanji


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After a long wait of 47 years, Lallanji was finally in Mumbai.

A dream comes true. After a long wait of 47 years, Lallanji was finally in Mumbai. Having lost his wife two years ago and marrying off all of his seven children, he was a free bird now. And freedom to him meant spending rest of his life in the city that belongs to everyone and everyone belongs to. His cousin had arranged for a job for him in a courier company and also a small room near Kandivali station. Four days of Mumbai darshan went by in no time and then came the day he was going to begin his new life in a new city…the city of his dreams.

All these days he had heard a lot about the rush in local trains and the tactic to board one. So Lallanji was all set to take the local train challenge head on. At the over crowded station of Kandivli, a tall and lofty man, dark, with a big face and really small eyes, large teeth with gap in between them wide enough to fit in another set and a incessant stupid smile on his face, joined the multitude of passengers. His movement was quick and his mind was alert. He had been taught that he had to just make his way through the crowd and at the same time watch out for his train. As soon as he climbed the bridge, he checked for his left and right. He had been told that since he would be climbing the bridge from the east end, the train to his office at Dadar would come from his right. Just then he saw a train entering the platform from his right. Lallanji darted through the crowd and in about just four leaps he was down the stairs and on the platform and in the fifth one he was on the train. And the train moved. He was hanging at the door and now he had to make his way in. He saw hands of all shapes and sizes pushing and smacking him and heard voices shrieking and yelling. But Lallanji had shut his senses to everything around and his concentration was only on getting in. He shoved and jostled his way through against the united force of his co-passengers. Finally he was well inside the compartment, safe and sound. So he relaxed. But what was this? Why were other passengers still hitting and pushing him? He roved his really small around and…he was in ladies compartment! For the first time all this while Lallanji realized what and why his co-passengers were shouting and hitting him. Now what? He apologized profusely but that smile on his face betrayed his intentions. It further irked the women passengers. Their yelling got louder and their punches got nastier. Lallanji got nervous, his heart contracted and he began to sweat. A woman yelled, ‘Pull the chain, pull the chain’. Lallanji panicked and in a reflex he stretched his hand out at the woman’s neck and…he pulled the chain.

What next? He was beaten blue and black by the women and the next stop saw him at the police station. His cousin was summoned at the police station and he was there in no time. He explained the entire situation to the station in-charge, who showed understating and let Lallanji go. Lallanji was advised to go back to his hometown and his cousin even promised to arrange for his tickets for the very next day. Even Lallanji agreed with everyone that the fast paced life of the city was not meant for him. He must go back the very next day.

The very next day, at the overcrowded platform no. 1 of Kandivli station, a tall and lofty man, dark, with a big face and really small eyes, large teeth with gap in between them wide enough to fit in another set and a incessant stupid smile on his face, joined the multitude of passengers for 08:10 am local to Church Gate.

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