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Myths About Magical Marriages- Demystified

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Myths About Magical Marriages-DemystifiedMarriage is probably one of the most important institutions in human society, as it signifies the bonding of two human beings in an everlasting bond of fellowship, in order to provide a safe and secure environment for the nurturing of the future generation. Hence, every society has its own concept of an ideal marriage (besides the common belief that the two people should be in love) and every married couple strives to attain this perfect picture. This often results in normal occurrences (like disappointment, hurt etc) which are very much a part of the process being considered as taboo. Hence, leave alone being discussed, they are not even acknowledged. The result is a drastic decline in the quality of marital life.

Most couples then reach a point where there are only two options (according to them):

1. Accept the present and decide to go along with it. (Most of the times this is the great sacrifice that they are willing to make for their children or families)

2. To break the bond and go their own separate ways.

However, according to marriage counselors and psychologists, there is still a very promising option left before couples who face disappointment in marriage, and that is communication. If the partners talk freely to each other then what seems to be a failed or unhappy marriage can be transformed into a healing process. A relationship of trust can be built wherein each partner can have the opportunity of experiencing “true love” which always leads to growth.

Just as there is no perfect person, there are no perfect marriages. Marriages can either be happy and wholesome or unhappy and claustrophobic. Most of the times our disappointments in marital life are a cause of our confusion between the myths and realities about marriage.

Myth no.1 - If you marry the person you love life is going to be just perfect. On the contrary, it is said that when you are in love you are blind (but your instincts aren’t). So, you most certainly choose the right man. However, soon after marriage we regain vision, and everything we overlooked then looms larger than life. But this is nature’s way of opening the doors of communication, which will lead to a better understanding of each other and the purpose of their union. Finally, culminating in a richer and more fruitful relationship.

Myth no. 2 - The first year of marriage is total bliss. False. Infact, it is the most difficult period. You may have known your partner for donkey’s years (even lived in), yet the situation is different once you are bonded. Marriage adds a new dimension to the relationship, a hitherto unexplored area. The role one plays is different and calls for a lot of patience, maturity and adjustment. Infact, if you can survive the first year chances are you will get further.

Myth no. 3 - If you find that you and your partner are drifting apart, have a child and that will cement the relationship. Though children are a good enough reason to stay together, it does not mean that the personal tension between the parents is eased because of the child. Infact, this emotional undercurrent between the parents is harmful for the child who may not understand it but certainly sense it.

I am sure that as you are reading this article, you will have thoughts of a whole lot of other myths that exist. Yet, I think that we will all agree that this institution has been instrumental in the development of a world where eternal values like love, understanding, caring and sharing are cherished. So, lets hope for more happy marriages. The ingredients are simple - insight, patience and understanding. The process, an open line of communication.

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