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The Papas of today


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The Papas of todayMr. Sumit Sen a young father says,” historically speaking, it is industralisation that has distanced man from the children. In an agrarian and hunting society men spent considerable time at home and participated in the bringing up of the kids. Particularly their education. Today’s scenario however is quite different. With both me and my wife going to work we not only share household chores but, also the bringing up of our child. I feel that as a father I contribute a lot in the everyday “looking after” of the child.

This is something that I naturally took upon myself when I found my wife had too many other things to do in the morning. Things which I could not take over. But when I think of my childhood, my father was only concerned about our education (to a certain extent) and about providing for our needs. So, in my opinion today’s fathers are more involved in the day to day affairs of the child.”

Most of us grew up in families where father earned for the family and was responsible for disciplining the children, while mother usually stayed at home, ran the house and loved, cared and looked after us. Therefore, the role of the father as the bread winner of the family is deeply ingrained in most of the men, yet fathers of today have different aspirations from those of yester years.

Most of the young fathers I spoke to said they were comfortable changing diapers. Some of them said they even read books and magazines on childcare. Though nearly all of them agree that mommy still remains the primary care giver, they feel that they want to take part in their child’s upbringing.

Gone are the days when the only people present at the birth of a baby were the doctor and the nurses or midwives. Today most would be fathers are present at the moment of birth. In fact they feel that it is important that they’re there.

Rahul a young accountant says, “I do not know how I would feel if I had to look after my daughter full time. But, I do know that I regretted going back to work soon after her birth. Not having the opportunity to bond with her during those crucial bonding times.”

Mr. Singh runs his own home office. He says, “initially Gul and I had had major problems when she was very upset about putting her career on the backseat (as it involved long hours and frequent absences from home) to look after our son. In fact she decided to take a break. But, though she never complained I just had to look at her to realize how much she missed her work at the office. So, I decided to start my own business from home and spend more time looking after our son. Today Jeet is five and I have absolutely no regrets. We are the happiest family on earth.”

“The best relationships are built on foundation of good friendship. Whether it’s with your child, spouse, neighbour, aunt or co-worker, if you’re not friends on some level, there’s not much of a connection.”

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