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Living together happily ever after?


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Live-in relationship

The other day I came across an article entitled “married couples may soon become a minority.” It went on to say that “live-in” arrangements are looked upon as far more convenient by more and more people. My experience with the issue has been quite unique. In fact, I think not many will disagree that though we desis have become more” modern” so to speak, some of us have even become courageous enough to attempt the outrageous, yet, most of us have managed to strike a happy balance.

Take for instance Sumita and Sachin. College sweethearts. Families know each other and it is decided that sometime in the future the two will get married. So, during the courtship years they move in with each other. After a couple of years the families declare a formal engagement and then the grand finale-the marriage. Isn’t, this what one can define as the perfect marriage of traditional and modern values?

However not everybody is that lucky. Quite a few still go through a tough struggle trying to figure out whether “living in” is after all such a good idea. Tina is crazily in love with Vaidyanathan. The two want to get married in the future. But, for the time being they plan to move in with each other. Vaidy has no second thoughts but, Tina still can’t make up her mind. The cause of confusion in her mind is because, she says, she has come across several “live in“ couples who break up simply because the women thought that marriage was a natural follow up action after a period of living together whereas the men didn’t seem to think that way.

Nandini and Deepraj plan to get married in a few years. There was a phase in their relationship when both wanted to move in with each other. But after some serious thought they decided against it. In Nandini’s words,”we thought that if we did this then all the excitement of getting married, the thrill and anticipation would be reduced to mere ritual. So, we decided to wait.”

After hearing all these stories I guess just as to live in or not to live in is a matter of personal choice so is the ultimate fate of a live in relationship. Some people believe that a live in relationship is like a marriage where there is no commitment. Others say that it is a fool proof way of finding out how compatible you are as a couple. Yet others say, marriage is only a recognition of couplehood. So, why is it necessary for a live in relationship to culminate in marriage?

Whatever is your take on the matter the fact remains that the matter needs some serious thinking through by both parties involved. Their views on living together, the institution of marriage and having family are areas that the couple must consider before taking a decision. And chances are the end will be a happy one!

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