Ragini’s birthday was a riotous affair at the office. Somebody had tied three balloons to her desk. Every few seconds, a colleague popped up to wish her. During lunch hour there was a party like atmosphere in the lunch room, with even her boss dropping in to wish her and say a few words. After he left, her face was smeared with cake, and she was given a few ‘birthday bumps’ by her more enthusiastic colleagues. Clearly, she was ‘Miss Popularity’ around her co-workers.

The trouble was, she was still ‘Miss’.

“When I think of that particular day, it was one of the days when it hit me more than other times,” recalls this executive in a leading mobile service provider. “My colleagues were celebrating my thirty-third birthday. I was laughing, cracking jokes, accepting their gifts or brickbats…but internally I was thinking, ‘If everyone here likes me so much, how come no one has liked me enough to marry me ever?’ By that evening, I was depressed, even though I didn’t dare show it to my friends.”

Shweta:

‘Just couldn’t find the green earrings that are an exact match for this salwar suit. Must find a better way to store my daily stuff. I wonder whether he notices? Whether I’m wearing green or blue with this green dress? I wonder whether he’ll even be there…’

Sandeep:

‘Almost killed myself getting into that runaway bus the last time. Must start at least five minutes earlier each morning. Does she always need to be there at the same time? Or is she getting used to seeing me on the same bus…’

Manish finishes work at 7 p.m on most days. After that, he is free to explore the city of Lucknow if he so wants. These days, he is finding it hard to exercise that freedom. “It was fine till my friend Bharat got married,” he says. “We usually had an agenda for the evening – eating ‘chaat’, going for a drink or a movie or dinner, or driving a little out of the city – depending on our mood and budget, there was always something to do. Now that he is married, he is as welcoming as ever. Even his wife is friendly, and always invites me home. Its just that I feel awkward to always ask for his company after office, when his wife and him also get time together only then.”

Any matrimonial column in India makes mention of the ‘homely’ girl. This should be the most desirable community, if one were to go by the column square inches devoted to them in many newspapers. So what do people mean when they say ‘homely’?

“Most of all, families in India dread getting a daughter-in-law who will break up the home, or at least, the pattern in which the family has gone on before she got married and entered as a daughter-in-law. Maximum TV serials show vengeful women causing havoc in homes and families, (although the heroine of the serial is generally sweet and ‘homely’!) and families want to make sure they are not getting one of those ladies. That’s why they take the trouble to add the word ‘homely’” says Deepti, a young woman studying for a career in the civil services who is not uncomfortable with the ‘homely’ label.

Resplendent in your wedding clothes, bedecked in your bridal finery and all dolled up to look like your perfect fantasy, that’s how you want to appear on your wedding day. Of course, a big part of your preparation will revolve around the wedding dress - design, style, colors, fabrics, embellishment… the choices available might just boggle your mind. Just about every combination of color, fabric and style you can think of is available and can be selected with your budget in mind.

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